Bitter sweet? some days. A blessing? Most days. That is what I would honestly say. I don't talk about it much, even with the one person in the world I know who gets it. I never talk about it with my husband...except when the occasional stupid card comes. Only because he knows it already and there is no need to dwell there. I don't really feel much when I think about it anymore. Sad to say that my own parents are strangers to me. There is someone I admire so much in this world. She is not liked by many. However, she also had an es trained relationship from her mom and a few days ago I actually heard her talk about it and she cried. The toughest person I know cried. She cried not for the loss of her mom, but for the loss of a mom. I.....cried too. I too miss not having a mom. My life is blessed times a million, and some days I wonder how and why. I get who I am and I am very comfortable there. I am the girl(I always have felt like a girl) that is most likely to be barefoot, covered in paint and now with a camera in her hand. I am a little quirky..some days a lot, I hardly ever get mad, I don't mind speaking my mind. I am very loyal. I am totally comfortable with talking about why I only have one kid, I think other people are more uncomfortable than I am. My biggest gift has been knowing that I only get two chances with the parent~child relationship. The first one I had no control over. This one I do. I am going to make it count:-) My son will be lucky enough to have both.
Happy mother's day to all the moms I know who get this too.
Also happy Mother's day to Linda who has become my mother by choice:-) And to my Mother in Law whom I adore and respect for her totally giving nature. I just realized how long of a list I could actually add to this....I just want to make sure I add Sue(Thank you times a million...still)
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Mother's day is bitter-sweet for me as well. I have my mom with me still. But we do not connect. I go for weeks without talking or having any form of communication with her, and sadly, I forget her.
ReplyDeleteWe were never very close. And it hurts to think about, and that is why it is bitter for me.
But I get the sweet from all my "moms" that have adopted me into their lives. I am so blessed to have women that care so much about me and treat me as family. And getting in trouble is even sweet, because I know they care!
I can't say I know where you are coming from, but the bitter-sweetness of mother's day is no stranger to me.
Diane....it is no wonder we get along so well! Every time I leave the cafe I think...I really miss being a youth minister. You make me miss all the high school kids that are now in college that were such a big part of my life. I am glad to see like me you are a forever optimist:-)
ReplyDeleteWell, I don't have a mom on earth anymore but I did have a wonderful relationship while she was here. Although, I have a dad that is alive but our relationship is not. So, I can sorta relate. Monica, I admire that you keep on living (and thrive) inspite of what your parents have or have not done in your life. You don't use it as a "crutch" to complain or to make excuses. You have turned that page in your life and started over. Many people let those situations control their life...not YOU! You are a fighter! Happy Mother's Day, my dear friend!
ReplyDeleteAmen Jenny! Monica, you are amazing! Hope you had a great mother's day! (oh, and I'll share my mom with you ANYday...I always wanted a sister!!!)
ReplyDeleteWhat a sweet post. So awesome that you have the viewpoint that you get two shots at the mother relationship. So wise to know what things in life you can/can't control.
ReplyDeleteGreat job posting outside your comfort zone!